Cali Sunshiner #94

Cali

Left soulless after witnessing her twin sister get caught inside and lethally eat it while shredding epic swell at Mavericks, Cali SunShiner went aggro and was banished from the SoCal surfing community. With no direction or purpose other than going drink for drink with the retired members of Motley Crüe, Cali was approached by the newly formed Bloods Laguna chapter. She gladly accepted her initiation mission of capturing and performing reverse plastic surgery on at least one cast member each from The Real Housewives, The O.C. and Laguna Beach, and was deemed "baddest-ass inductee" after also massacring the set of a Baywatch Christmas reunion special on her way home. Cali quickly attracted attention for her unusual methods of brutality, and, escaping retaliation from the 18th Street Gang and a joint lawsuit with Mtv and the Bravo Network, was exiled by her L.A. porn industry defense attorneys to the one place no one would ever think to look for her – North Tonawanda, N.Y.

Cold, tequila-less and electrolyte-imbalanced from sea air deprivation, Cali wandered the streets in a daze, until a pair of skates – the same black and orange as her long-discarded surfboard "Flame" – beckoned to her from the window of a pawn shop. She drew her cruelest weapon of brutality on the owner (death by sex appeal), grabbed the skates, and was instantly filled with her lost sister's (a.k.a. "The Mean One") spirit, which led her to find the epitome of East Si-eede malice…the Queen City Roller Girls.

To this day, Cali avenges without relent…so look out dude-ettes, she could be riding the wave of destruction your way!